I saw this old building for the first time today and immediately I had a feeling of longing. I missed the building. It was kind of nostalgic.
I thought to myself "can you feel nostalgic towards something you've never known or felt in your life!?"
Something drew me towards this old building. I had a feeling these old walls wanted to tell me all the secrets they have witnessed over the years. I could hear them whisper "come closer and listen carefully".
I took a step closer to listen....
I could almost feel the sound of bhindi being chopped in the veranda, the smell of bhindi being cooked in the kitchen, the sound of three cooker whistles from the kitchen and footsteps rushing to turn off the cooker. I could almost feel it all.
I took another step closer...
I could hear the sound of the window cracking and the ball thumping into the living room.
I took another step closer....
I almost stumbled into the kids who were running away to escape the wrath of whoever lived in the house, leaving the bat and wickets on the roads and running for their lives.
I thought to myself: I mean, I couldn't possibly have run into someone here, right? After all, it's an empty abandoned apartment. Before I took the next step, I looked around to make sure it was actually empty. It was.
So, I took another step closer..
I could hear arguments. Arguments between people who knew eachother? Perhaps a family? The conversations seemed personal and intimate. They picked out eachother's insecurities and did not hold back in punching eachother to the ground. I could see someone getting up and stabbing the ones on the floor. I could feel the pain of being literally stabbed. It was unbearable.
It felt wrong and almost impossible to take the next step. I have gone too close. I have gone too far. I wanted to turn around but I couldn't. I realised I am not in control of my actions. I have never been.
I found myself moving another step closer...
This time... I felt nothing. I heard nothing.
So, I took another step closer and then another and then another until I was practically next to the main door. But I couldn't hear anything anymore. I felt nothing anymore. It was all just a blank.
